Thanks for validating my deepest, darkest paranoia

Bold of you to assume I was invited

Delete Tinder, we are hiring a wizard

He sees your soul and your snacks

“Nailed it,” said every pigeon ever

When your relationship status is strictly administrative

The Beakles

No paper means I am officially a ghost!

I don’t even have patience to boil water

The dark side has a very strict manager

Accept all cookies for maximum energy

The casserole cartel has been busted

I learned about feudalism from a cat

personal attack on rock bands

“Imagine only having two legs, truly tragic”

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