Is it a tree, or the idea of a tree?

I’m one “how’s work” away from laying on the rug

Can we make the trees look like curly fries?

I miss the static, but I don’t miss the hernia

100% prepared for a situation that doesn’t exist

blood type “Zero Ultra”

10 items or less? No, 10 minutes or more.

I’m not a regular adult, I’m a cool adult

The sign says “No,” his eyes say “Maybe”

Congratulations

No one will ever ask to stay over

poker face

“it’s fine”…a full PowerPoint presentation

Tomorrow’s lunch is currently a beautiful memory.

I’m looking for a fork and some dignity.

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