I am currently on slice number seven today

When you’re too lazy to swim your laps

My family thanksgiving dinners would be silent

That yellow carpet is about to see things

The longest five seconds in human history

When you refuse to buy a five-dollar stand

He’s not sick, he’s just starting college

“missed plot points are your problem”

Years passed but the grudge stayed fresh

sharing is caring

That is a very serious sauce collection

This meeting should have been an email

High fashion beauty on a breakfast budget

a hyperactive scribble

The casserole cartel has been busted

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