Michelin stars mean nothing to a toddler

Bold of you to assume I was invited

That strawberry has a deep villain voice

The vest says safety, the spikes say danger

The Beakles

My phone ringtone is a complete mystery

He is the captain of this vehicle now

“Back in my day, remotes had actual buttons”

Life is way too short for boring books

Give this man a PhD in parking law

“Imagine only having two legs, truly tragic”

apologize to him immediately

A beautiful circle of absolute trust issues

Woke up a one, currently at a three

One more birthday and she can’t use doors

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