I was kind of a tomboy growing up…

I was kind of a tomboy growing up...

Hoo-rah!

The scent of love

The scent of love

Earns $20 million per movie role. Worth every penny

Earns $20 million per movie role. Worth every penny

… with a louisville slugger

… with a louisville slugger

I like my popcorn with melted stonehenge poured over it

I like my popcorn with melted stonehenge poured over it

good thing i packed tortilla chips!

good thing i packed tortilla chips!

… in the pros’ column

… in the pros’ column

Doggo 1, young child 0

Doggo 1, young child 0

Nope. I’m moo-ving out

Nope. I’m moo-ving out

gator melted like ice cream

gator melted like ice cream

eat, sleep, ignore, repeat

eat, sleep, ignore, repeat

please send help

please send help

What is a “disappointed vampire noise,” exactly?

What is a “disappointed vampire noise,” exactly?

Let’s avocuddle, sometime

Let’s avocuddle, sometime

The cheeps