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500 freedoms per second!
863 AWESOME
89 WTW
122 BORING
2017 clogged drain pageant.
Boats are just drowning space ships.
OOOF
She wanted to go to the game…
Winter is mooing.
If college was free, nobody would join the military?
I still love you, pussy cat.
Goodbye, Cassini – A Memorial
You can’t handle the cat life.
Brace yourselves. IOS 11 is coming.
Le Tripod Squad
Eggstatic about the egg budget.
How does this stupid box work?
Cover me, I’m reloading!
May heaven bring you a flurry of excitement. RIP Hugh Hefner.
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birds aren’t real so it doesn’t matter anyway
flat earthers were right the whole time
i was without a phone once for 12 hours and it’s amazing how much attention i was able to pay to other things
i have such fond memories of funnel milk
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modern parenting – resisting the urge to throw your child in the squishmallow display
there is no way the ice cream man didn’t see this person
gravity doesn’t exist when you’re a goat
It all sounds awful until you remember that statistically flying is still the safest form of travel
even einstein’s marriage was relative. It consumed his life
no serial killer, ted bundy included, could match wits with me if i really applied by myself instead of binging on oreos
this is not the car you want to end up behind on the freeway
you know that you know you’ve seen that actor before
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