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Sometimes The Onion’s jokes are too real
1416 AWESOME
361 WTW
90 BORING
Writers gonna write…
*invests in Depends*
I said nah…
Welcome to America, bud.
Improvise, adapt, punkin pie.
Get to gettin’ back to bed.
The great thing about mittens, is…
It’s a good teacher.
Pizza forward.
Hail Turducken
I’m not a big fan of magic..
A very personal autopsy.
Llamas on ffire.
30 is the new 80
Need a walk in the park, bud?
Words.
You should really cough in to your elbow…
*gets chlamydia…*
…and his name, was Po.
Join the conversation
PSA: Not every person has your best interest in mind right now.
The pets are sick of us.
The things we put up with for silence.
United we stand, though.
Bubble warfare!
Ashlyn is being a reasonable human right now.
No back out at checkout, Madre.
Ready to roll out…
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