Words by Whoopi

Words by Whoopi

there’s a very limited window between an omelet and scrambled eggs

there’s a very limited window between an omelet and scrambled eggs

michael’s store employees use the honor system

michael’s store employees use the honor system

fine, i’ll do it myself!

fine, i’ll do it myself!

wife created sign to let neighbors know that new grass was on the way

wife created sign to let neighbors know that new grass was on the way

let’s hear about your love lives via literature!

let’s hear about your love lives via literature!

his name was close enough

his name was close enough

you should have just bought snacks!

you should have just bought snacks!

was the lettuce on her head a gift from her boyfriend?

was the lettuce on her head a gift from her boyfriend?

don’t look down! Would you sleep on the side of a mountain like this?

don’t look down! Would you sleep on the side of a mountain like this?

phrasing matters

phrasing matters

i’ll be your dungeon master if you’ll be my paladin

i’ll be your dungeon master if you’ll be my paladin

if you set your toaster on fire, you should probably just order in every meal

if you set your toaster on fire, you should probably just order in every meal

is there no end to their destruction?

is there no end to their destruction?

japan rewards employees who don’t smoke. would this work where you live?

japan rewards employees who don’t smoke. would this work where you live?

it’s the only way to make the calls stop

it’s the only way to make the calls stop