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First thing you touch when you wake up?

First thing you touch when you wake up?
horsing around
horsing around
asstarion
asstarion
postmate
postmate
playing porch pirates
playing porch pirates
reality sucks
reality sucks
rotten potato
rotten potato
flipper flops
flipper flops
14 Funny Job Search Memes to Never Hear Back From
14 Funny Job Search Memes to Never Hear Back From
Weekly Dose of Wholesome to Lift Your Spirits (May 18)
Weekly Dose of Wholesome to Lift Your Spirits (May 18)
cereal killer
cereal killer
10 Funny Biking Memes to Joyride With
10 Funny Biking Memes to Joyride With
catlike reflex
catlike reflex
life in the fast lane
life in the fast lane
donut wine pairings
donut wine pairings
screenshot scramble
screenshot scramble
Nope.+I%26%238217%3Bm+moo-ving+out
Nope. I’m moo-ving out
Clickity+click%2C+clickity+click
Clickity click, clickity click
Hoo-rah%21
Hoo-rah!
The+scent+of+love
The scent of love
Join the conversation
the+circle+of+%26%238220%3Bawww+crap%26%238221%3B
the circle of “awww crap”
No+one+can+stop+us%21
No one can stop us!
because+i%26%238217%3Bm+a+normal+person
because i’m a normal person
Let%26%238217%3Bs+avocuddle%2C+sometime
Let’s avocuddle, sometime
the+biggest+little+pupper+in+the+park
the biggest little pupper in the park
please+send+help
please send help
Doggo+1%2C+young+child+0
Doggo 1, young child 0
What+is+a+%26%238220%3Bdisappointed+vampire+noise%2C%26%238221%3B+exactly%3F
What is a “disappointed vampire noise,” exactly?