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men only want one thing :(

Words.
Words.
Rambo vs. MacGyver vs. Chuck Norris.
Rambo vs. MacGyver vs. Chuck Norris.
True story.
True story.
McHitler.
McHitler.
How people see me.
How people see me.
I’m wearing a jacket because…
I’m wearing a jacket because…
Number of cats it takes to make the pain go away.
Number of cats it takes to make the pain go away.
Smell like a monster!
Smell like a monster!
You don’t say?!
You don’t say?!
Hate when that happens.
Hate when that happens.
I think they’re cool now.
I think they’re cool now.
This is how I die.
This is how I die.
100 things to do before you die.
100 things to do before you die.
I want to be a stay at home mom, but without the kids.
I want to be a stay at home mom, but without the kids.
If you watch Cinderella backwards…
If you watch Cinderella backwards…
Hors+don%26%238217%3Bt+care+for+heels.
Hors don’t care for heels.
Can%26%238217%3Bt+trust+them+with+the+salad%26%238230%3B
Can’t trust them with the salad…
It%26%238217%3Bs+fine+to+be+a+lil%26%238217%3B+sus.
It’s fine to be a lil’ sus.
it+wasn%26%238217%3Bt+me+%26%238211%3B+gato%2C+probably
it wasn’t me – gato, probably
Join the conversation
Beware+the+peanut+vendor+wearing+his+suit+of+peanuts%2C+circa+1895.
Beware the peanut vendor wearing his suit of peanuts, circa 1895.
At+least+yer+a+wizard%26%238230%3B
At least yer a wizard…
Cowboy+mysticism+is+thriving.
Cowboy mysticism is thriving.
Good+talk%26%238230%3B
Good talk…
This+little+piggy+went+ORWELLIAN%26%238230%3B
This little piggy went ORWELLIAN…
Just+2020+things.
Just 2020 things.
Now+that%26%238217%3Bs+what+I+call+a+big+gulp.
Now that’s what I call a big gulp.
She+baby+birds+me.
She baby birds me.