Alexa, ruin christmas with my family this year
Oh really, Home Depot?
The nasal telescope.
Keeping morale up.
She wants the (Ph)D
Having a death wish looks fun
What the Great Wall of China should have been…
How would you spend your last day on earth?
World’s best cough syrup [circa 1888]
Reasons your girlfriend liked Avengers.
Having the talk.
How has this not been invented yet?!
The new black-man phrase.
How tall are you?
It’s so much easier…