this is why i just buy new clothes when all my old ones are dirty

up? down? sideways

just one?

and they told me the perfect husband doesn’t exist

write the next line of this story

what do you think could explain the mysterious red lights?

this tweet about fire departments feels pretty on point

you were the chosen one. you were supposed to bring balance to your teeth, not ruin them!

This is a brilliant grandpa move

kermit the dinosaur – how angry does this make you?

made with hatred – can you add anything to the list?

When you gotta go, you gotta go

There’s an app for that, which probably doesn’t work in the dead zone known as parking garages

The moon is impossible to photograph on a phone

a picture that perfectly represents what being told “i love you as friend” feels like

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