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parenting perjury

A musical typewriter.
A musical typewriter.
Master Shredder!
Master Shredder!
God. I feel so depressed.
God. I feel so depressed.
I understand why you’re vegan.
I understand why you’re vegan.
Don’t fart, don’t fart, don’t fart..
Don’t fart, don’t fart, don’t fart..
Big-head helmet
Big-head helmet
Dedicated to the lab rats.
Dedicated to the lab rats.
Odds are I will never see you again.
Odds are I will never see you again.
Just take a moment to realize…
Just take a moment to realize…
slurp slurp
slurp slurp
I hate it when this happens…
I hate it when this happens…
Why we still need to print newspapers.
Why we still need to print newspapers.
Throne Envy
Throne Envy
Get away from my food! Wait… You’re…. Really fluffy.
Get away from my food! Wait… You’re…. Really fluffy.
4 simple rules for eating a banana.
4 simple rules for eating a banana.
I%26%238217%3Bd+like+to+pay+with+a+laser+light+show%2C+please
I’d like to pay with a laser light show, please
Seriously%2C+why+won%26%238217%3Bt+you+stop+hitting+yourself%3F
Seriously, why won’t you stop hitting yourself?
He+became+his+legacy.+Literally
He became his legacy. Literally
Followed+directions+perfectly
Followed directions perfectly
Join the conversation
Needs+more+salt
Needs more salt
35+seasons+in+love+and+still+going+strong
35 seasons in love and still going strong
And+together+they+will+conquer+the+dog+park
And together they will conquer the dog park
Is+this+true%3F
Is this true?
I+don%26%238217%3Bt+see+the+problem
I don’t see the problem
there+is+no+escape.+Only+zuul
there is no escape. Only zuul
Calmly+plotting+your+demise
Calmly plotting your demise
mind+blown
mind blown