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please move your emergency somewhere else

the kazoo of civility will bring an end to all political debates around the holiday dinner table
the kazoo of civility will bring an end to all political debates around the holiday dinner table
if alanis morisette owned a landscaping company
if alanis morisette owned a landscaping company
oh no is an understatement
oh no is an understatement
You never know. the guy asking might be into penguin onesies
You never know. the guy asking might be into penguin onesies
this is exactly why you don’t send texts with microsoft excel
this is exactly why you don’t send texts with microsoft excel
gonna have to unfollow a lot of things, if we’re being honest
gonna have to unfollow a lot of things, if we’re being honest
someone found this shell at the beach with barnacles around it that make it look like a heart
someone found this shell at the beach with barnacles around it that make it look like a heart
a shower sounds so relaxing i tell myself before coming up with a fake argument in my head that i inevitably lose
a shower sounds so relaxing i tell myself before coming up with a fake argument in my head that i inevitably lose
just when you think everything is perfect your bladder decides to speak up. every time.
just when you think everything is perfect your bladder decides to speak up. every time.
do they make this vest in adult human sizes?
do they make this vest in adult human sizes?
Have you tried burying yourself under as much lavender as possible?
Have you tried burying yourself under as much lavender as possible?
bats fly through the power of jazz hands. You can’t convince me otherwise
bats fly through the power of jazz hands. You can’t convince me otherwise
You know Marvel is running out of ideas when Toilet King enters the MCU
You know Marvel is running out of ideas when Toilet King enters the MCU
baby squid eggs found inside a seashell
baby squid eggs found inside a seashell
That’s because we are closed and other viral tweets
That’s because we are closed and other viral tweets
praying+over+leftovers
praying over leftovers
you+are+the+card+holder
you are the card holder
same
same
this+sentence+is+cursed
this sentence is cursed
Join the conversation
silent+but+deadly
silent but deadly
eating+fish+in+the+office+if+only+acceptable+if%26%238230%3B
eating fish in the office if only acceptable if…
highway+to+the+manger+zone
highway to the manger zone
cat+surprise%21
cat surprise!
name+this+%26%238217%3B90s+boy+band
name this ’90s boy band
what%26%238217%3Bs+your+taco+bell+order%3F
what’s your taco bell order?
tiktok+rock
tiktok rock
yep
yep