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Always double up on the egg salad.
1509 AWESOME
154 WTW
97 BORING
you’re not fooling anyone nasa!
taking a break from pickpocketing to warm my bones with a hot drink
It all sounds awful until you remember that statistically flying is still the safest form of travel
even einstein’s marriage was relative. It consumed his life
no serial killer, ted bundy included, could match wits with me if i really applied by myself instead of binging on oreos
you know that you know you’ve seen that actor before
Best responses to tweet about “mystery flight”
new job opportunity – unfortunately it lacks upward mobility
there is no way the ice cream man didn’t see this person
jesus was larger than a baby but smaller than a temple. good to know!
i have such fond memories of funnel milk
this is how many sides a circle has
how to beat someone at chess when you’ve never played before
toast and butter is an everyday phase
the real reason millennials aren’t buying diamonds. Has nothing to do with ethics or morals
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An ancient guide to girding your loins.
Kitty kisses are the best.
I’ll have you know, I’m a Doctor…
Teach them young.
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A village in Yemen.
DMV Timelapse.
We must protect the baby.
Can I burn my mother in a small gathering?
…The laughter of a man who knows the funniest joke in the world.
We hates it!
Canadian military strategy
Be nice and eat cookie.
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