this is my only child

The Miami Zoo’s flamingoes’ temporary shelter during Hurricane Andrew 20 years ago today

Statistically…

A flight of cupcakes I made for a friend’s 30th birthday at a brewery. The beer is in each cupcake’s batter.

Kenneth, a word?

Dude. Not cool.

I’ve arrived.

Parks & Rec would’ve had such a hilarious episode about Pokemon Go.

As an American watching British television

That paw though

Pure Structured Water

"This text has no other purpose than to terrify those who are afraid of the Arabic language."

Suck it

Geneception

Storm in Moscow

I’m working with idiots