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toot machine

An internal battle.
An internal battle.
When teachers told me Wikipedia should not be a source.
When teachers told me Wikipedia should not be a source.
Every time I go to a coffee shop…
Every time I go to a coffee shop…
I work at a table factory…
I work at a table factory…
Couples…
Couples…
I hate hipsters.
I hate hipsters.
Are we thinking the same, Mr. Zazzles?
Are we thinking the same, Mr. Zazzles?
The Chief.
The Chief.
Newton’s Third Law of Emotion.
Newton’s Third Law of Emotion.
The perfect martini.
The perfect martini.
That’s not a fire pit!
That’s not a fire pit!
Words.
Words.
He finally caught his tail!
He finally caught his tail!
She’s very dainty.
She’s very dainty.
How to tell when a Girl, a Guy or I want to kiss
How to tell when a Girl, a Guy or I want to kiss
What+do+you+think+when+passing+a+policeman+on+a+street%3F
What do you think when passing a policeman on a street?
Home+is+whenever+I%26%238217%3Bm+with+cats.
Home is whenever I’m with cats.
Kids+are+freaks.
Kids are freaks.
Patience.
Patience.
Join the conversation
That+awkward+moment+when%26%238230%3B
That awkward moment when…
Not+sure+if+hot+chick+is+hitting+on+me%26%238230%3B
Not sure if hot chick is hitting on me…
Recess-ion%21
Recess-ion!
Words.
Words.
Happy+Thanksgiving%21
Happy Thanksgiving!
I+don%26%238217%3Bt+always+drink+my+own+piss%26%238230%3B
I don’t always drink my own piss…
Vegan.
Vegan.
Statistics+on+death.
Statistics on death.