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when life gives you onions…

i was without a phone once for 12 hours and it’s amazing how much attention i was able to pay to other things
i was without a phone once for 12 hours and it’s amazing how much attention i was able to pay to other things
how to beat someone at chess when you’ve never played before
how to beat someone at chess when you’ve never played before
you know that you know you’ve seen that actor before
you know that you know you’ve seen that actor before
This is really the only acceptable way to watch four hour movies
This is really the only acceptable way to watch four hour movies
no serial killer, ted bundy included, could match wits with me if i really applied by myself instead of binging on oreos
no serial killer, ted bundy included, could match wits with me if i really applied by myself instead of binging on oreos
jesus was larger than a baby but smaller than a temple. good to know!
jesus was larger than a baby but smaller than a temple. good to know!
Best responses to tweet about “mystery flight”
Best responses to tweet about “mystery flight”
who pooped the bed? sounds like an it’s always sunny in philadelphia episode
who pooped the bed? sounds like an it’s always sunny in philadelphia episode
even einstein’s marriage was relative. It consumed his life
even einstein’s marriage was relative. It consumed his life
there is no way the ice cream man didn’t see this person
there is no way the ice cream man didn’t see this person
It all sounds awful until you remember that statistically flying is still the safest form of travel
It all sounds awful until you remember that statistically flying is still the safest form of travel
you’re not fooling anyone nasa!
you’re not fooling anyone nasa!
taking a break from pickpocketing to warm my bones with a hot drink
taking a break from pickpocketing to warm my bones with a hot drink
i have such fond memories of funnel milk
i have such fond memories of funnel milk
this is how many sides a circle has
this is how many sides a circle has
the+inspiration+for+chip+%26%238216%3Bn+dale
the inspiration for chip ‘n dale
which+wins%2C+flex+seal+or+spike+strips%3F
which wins, flex seal or spike strips?
if+you+haven%26%238217%3Bt+already%2C+one+day+you+will
if you haven’t already, one day you will
smol+cat+holding+toe+beans
smol cat holding toe beans
Join the conversation
the+power+of+monopoly
the power of monopoly
the+best+feeling%21
the best feeling!
roomba+on+the+run%21
roomba on the run!
make+sure+she+can+hear+you
make sure she can hear you
rice+fixes+everything
rice fixes everything
3+minutes+after+clipping+fingernails
3 minutes after clipping fingernails
coping+mechanism+police
coping mechanism police
i%26%238217%3Bve+made+a+terrible+mistake
i’ve made a terrible mistake