Scott Croker

Writer for I Waste So Much Time.

story about a girl setting her toaster on fire

if you set your toaster on fire, you should probably just order in every meal

a girl with a piece of lettuce on her head

was the lettuce on her head a gift from her boyfriend?

text about storming the call center for extended car warranties

it’s the only way to make the calls stop

michael’s store employees use the honor system

don’t look down! Would you sleep on the side of a mountain like this?

tweet about a last name mix up at school

his name was close enough

lawn full of dead grass with sign reading new grass loading

wife created sign to let neighbors know that new grass was on the way

image telling how japan gives employees who don't smoke extra days off a year

japan rewards employees who don’t smoke. would this work where you live?

text about overthinking so much you come up with answers that dont exist

fine, i’ll do it myself!

prompt to pick up a book and go to page 206. the first sentence describes your love life

let’s hear about your love lives via literature!

tweet about showing up to somone's house dressed as a wizard and askig them to roll a 20 sided die

i’ll be your dungeon master if you’ll be my paladin

tweet about having 45 second between making an omelet and having it turn into scrambled eggs

there’s a very limited window between an omelet and scrambled eggs

image of a dog chasing a rhino

it happens to the best of us ‘lil dude.

meme about not buying snacks and now being hungry because you didn't buy snacks

you should have just bought snacks!

image of three kinds of seasonings

the learning how to season starter pack that any amateur chef needs in their pantry

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