he’s not small

he's not small

these are the best moments

these are the best moments

that’s a big nope

that's a big nope

time is money

time is money

i’m ‘shocked’ it was abandoned

i'm 'shocked' it was abandoned

dad meltdown pending

dad meltdown pending

seemed like a fair trade at the time

seemed like a fair trade at the time

always check your grammar

always check your grammar

luckily there were no icebergs nearby

luckily there were no icebergs nearby

ghost ostrich

ghost ostrich

some fish like it rough

some fish like it rough

this is what salt looks like under an electron microscope

this is what salt looks like under an electron microscope

this is the kind of dad i want to be

this is the kind of dad i want to be

he’s about to order some delivery lasagna

he's about to order some delivery lasagna

stops for ducks, still wins gold

stops for ducks, still wins gold
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